Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Pull Your Life Together Tuesday


1or·der·ly

 adjective \-lē\

Definition of ORDERLY

1
(1) : arranged or disposed in some order or pattern :regular <orderly rows of houses> (2) : marked by order :tidy <keeps an orderly desk>
b : governed by law : regulated <an orderly universe>
c : methodical <an orderly mind>
2
: well behaved : peaceful <an orderly crowd>
— orderly adverb

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Easing the Load

Have you ever had an area of your life that inexplicably seems to have the power to suck the joy right out of your attitude?
Like you just can't seem to get on top of exercise and make it a habit or every paycheck just doesn't quite cover all the bills you have and every time you look in the mirror or pull out your checkbook you almost hear a whisper.....'failure.'
We're called to manage a variety of areas in our life, all of them need tending and we have affinity to attend to some areas more so than others. You know, the not fun ones.
I've been on a journey of decluttering and simplifying for a number of years.
I'm not going at it break-neck speed, mind you, there are other things that need my attention but embracing the thought that slow and steady get me ready.
After my mother's death, this phrase resounds in my being:  Live Light and Die Tidy.

That's, of course, a goal and I'm not quite there but for the most part have been enjoying the journey.
It fascinates me that sense of lightness that comes from accomplishing another milestone on the journey.
As well as the blessing that comes from sharing your 'bounty' with others who could really use it.
Love that.

but for that one area.....or two or thirteen.....it would be done.

I have a few of those joy-sucking areas in my life.
Every time I passed that one room in the house that is so awfully,  momentously, gigantically disorganized for THAT long a time period, inside I felt ...'failure.'
But today I crossed what seemed like a mountain.
Not quite as big a deal as Frodo and Sam heading to Mount Doom but it sure felt like that.
And for that long too, I should add.
And I didn't do it alone.

I made a deal with a friend to swap some time working on projects at each of our homes.
First installment today.
Oh my goodness, did we have fun.
In 2 hours the joy-sucking room was DONE, I couldn't hardly believe it.
My husband and I keep going downstairs to just look at the room, how funny is that?!
The voice of failure for that particular issue has been silenced.
And the quiet is so peaceful.
What a gift she gave me today.
The gift of her enthusiasm, her time, her presence, her energy, her joy and walked with me into greater freedom.
How cool is that?!
Ecc 4:9-10 says Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

I can't hardly wait to go tackle an area in her home, in some small measure giving the same joy I'm experiencing now.
Who can you touch for freedom today?  It can come in the smallest ways.  A kind word, a smile, a quick phone call or note.  Just knowing someone out there is thinking about them can fill someone with comfort, even for a fleeting moment.  It just might interrupt the whisper.......and you could have a ball!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

At School Forever

2 Corinthians 3:18 And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

The benefit of knowing you're in a 'learning environment.'


When we're in school, we just know we're not going to 'get it' all at once, or after the first time, there will be labs, worksheets, pop quizzes, exams.  None of which are particularly fun, probably a little stressful.
I wonder how I'll do? Do I know the  material well enough or are we back at it again until I get it?  

And as an adult learner who has probably chosen to put themselves in that environment by registering for the class and paying the fee, you are making the choice to alter your schedule to accommodate classes or labs, you're choosing to do the homework even if it means staying up late or getting up ridiculously early, you're choosing to submit reports and take exams.  You're choosing because the benefits of learning the material and incorporating it in our lives is worth the price.  You know that going in on the front end. 

How much better would the experience of our Christian life be if we understood we were in a learning environment?  
We're being transformed into the image of Christ. 
We ask Jesus into our hearts, to be our Lord and Savior, rescue us from our sins and bring us into a great life relationship with Him until we go to heaven to be with Him for eternity. 
We are, in fact, asking for a learning curve. 
Generally speaking, we don't know what scripture says much less how to put it into practice. We need the embrace of those around us to mentor us, helping to guide in understanding the amazing things we can learn AND put into practice now.  
Fascinatingly, as adults, it's not uncommon to come at this new life of faith with an antagonistic attitude to those around us who would love to help us in our journey of discovery.  It hits a pride nerve, as if we were lesser somehow for needing to learn new things. 
Is the doctor the bad guy because he diagnoses an issue?  Nope.  Neither is your pastor or Sunday School teacher. :-) They're just seeing a place to grow to greater freedom.  
How awful would the doctor be if he knew there was illness there but didn't care enough about you to say something that treatment might be started. 
You're not lesser, or dumb, or a second-class Christian citizen, you're just newer to the journey.  It doesn't matter how old you are in years.  New is GREAT, whoohooo for new.  There's no badness in that.  It just means there's stuff to explore as God is very intent about His job of transforming us into His likeness.  
There will be homework. :-) There will be labs.  He LOVES on the job training, I've discovered. 
We'll go into situations not knowing all we need to, which is precisely why He allows us the privilege of being in that circumstance--that we can first learn what we don't know, then set about embracing His enablement through the Holy Spirit, that we might gain that knowledge to put into practice to love His people better. Knowing this is what's happening can bring a ton of comfort.  
So take the Sunday School classes that are offered, be in a weekly bible study, get involved in the lives of people around you and just know you're learning and it's ok.  We're all learning.  Your learning curve is a beautiful thing to God.  You're going to do some things beautifully and be surprised how naturally some things come.  
You're going to hose up a ton of stuff, say things you shouldn't, be in the wrong place at the wrong time and learn.  Make use of the training.  Be of good cheer!  God loves you just the way you are.  He also loves you too much to just leave you there.  You will become more kind, more loving, more patient, more forgiving, because He is intent to work those character qualities in you if you just participate WITH Him instead of fighting AGAINST the learning. It is worth all the effort you put into it because your life is transformed and the lives of the people around you are impacted by the transformation. 

So Father, today, please help us to see your kind hand of training in the situations in our lives, bless us with your power to step into the moment knowing you're with us and help us to learn all that you would have us learn, for your glory.  May your kingdom grow, more people become free by our willing and humble hands and hearts.  
amen. 

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Loving the Unlovely

I was reeling.
I remember it like yesterday.
Only a week had passed since that early morning I was in the bed with my mom, holding her as she took her last breath.  The tip of her nose turned white...
then the white line moved down her nose to encompass her whole face.
And somewhere I heard wailing.
Primal wailing.
Then I realized it was me.

And there I was a week later, surrounded by people celebrating someone's momentous life occasion.
Feeling disoriented by the joy around me.
I quietly stole off to the bedroom, crumpled to the floor and cried out to God.
'how dare you.
how dare you ask me to love these people when I'm hurting so badly.
You're asking too much.
I have nothing left.
I hurt.
I hurt so bad I don't know how to breathe.
I have nothing.
except pain.
that these folks are celebrating offends me.
it hurts, God it just hurts. '

And in the quiet of my heart I heard, 'loving the unlovely doesn't mean just loving people who stink.'
In just that moment understanding came.
We will always be called to love those that offend us.
It could be smell, sheesh, that's the easy one, right?
It could be anything that rubs us the wrong way....something that gets up our nose.
How they laugh too loudly, or dress to weirdly or maybe it's all the tattoos or piercings.
Maybe they talk all the time or never at all, so you never know what they're thinking.
Or maybe they process life negatively.  You know, those folks that don't have much positive to say.
The Anti-Pollyanna, if you will.

I was surrounded by people who were fabulous people, really.  And the celebration was important to celebrate.
What I learned that day was to never draw the line on what I won't love because Jesus never does.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.  Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

Filled, surrounded by His peace, I wiped my face, blew my nose and went on to join the party.
Who are you missing out on loving today because they're not packaged as would make you comfortable?
If we are not well content with our weakness, how will we ever experience the power of Christ dwelling in us?
Make the choice to set that aside and just jump in to the loving and see what a beautiful thing God will do.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

I snub thee.....

Have you ever been on a team or in a group where you didn't enjoy everyone there?
haha, right?!
Everyone over 12 has been in that situation.
Back when we were kids, someone would just come out and say, "I don't like you!"
and get fussed at by the nearest grownup.....something about that not being kind.
But it would be out in the open and we could muster up the bravery to ask, 'what'd I ever do to you? I want you to be my friend. If I hurt your feelings, I'll say I"m sorry.'

So we learn to be more indirect about telling people we don't like them.
And of course, in church culture, it's religiously incorrect to not like someone.
Jesus loved everyone and so should you.
(insert pressure to conform here.)
People learn the art of the snub.
Not looking directly at you when you're speaking ....
or not acknowledging you when you have said something as if your voice wasn't heard or worthy to comment on.
Or watching someone go down a different hallway when they see you coming.
that terrifying moment when your eyes meet and they quickly avert their gaze.
Or when you comment on Facebook and they 'like' everyone else's comment but yours as if their navigations weren't visible to all.
and we smile with our mouth but our eyes belie the truth--I snub thee, in Jesus name.
We're left with the sense that our very being holds no value.
But that can't be right we tell ourselves because the bible says we're of incredible value to Him.
The bible tells us we are to love everyone but how do we handle loving someone when we either don't like them or don't feel liked by them?
Questions to wrestle with until He returns.
And then the question will probably feel pretty dumb in light of His glory.
There is something about the simple acknowledgement of 'I see you.' that communicates incredible value and worth to someone.

Father, forgive me, for your word tells me that love never fails.
Help me to be generous as You are generous with acknowledging all the others that You love so desperately.
Help me extend love and grace to others who are irritated by my presence.
Give me wisdom to know if this is a place you're looking to modify in my life or if the issue is theirs so it doesn't lodge in my heart and become a wound.
Help me to be brave to extend welcome to others and to just walk encompassed by your welcome regardless of how others are choosing to respond to me.



Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Gimme my crutch...

 Ventura said, "Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people......

Years ago, Jesse Ventura, once the governor of the state of Minnesota was speaking about religion and began with the above statement.  The remainder of the remarks are here....http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesse_Ventura#Comments_on_religion

You'll have to read the whole of his comments to get his gist but how he began his statement struck a resounding chord for me.
a crutch for weak-minded people....
Yes, Jesse, that part I agree with.
Organized religion has it's place but that's a topic for another discussion.

Almost 22 years ago, I recognized my weakness and asked Jesus to rescue me.
Of all the countless decisions I've ever made, I've not once regretted that one.
What I've found is that we are all weak-minded people in some fashion or another.
Just another evidence of our humanity not our determination.
We prove Romans right multiple times a day.

Romans 7:21 So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; 23 but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. 24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!

The tragedy for me is that so many others don't recognize they need His strength.

Jesus...
I need you.
Second by second, day by day, left to myself, I'll mess up everything and can never earn a place in your favor.
Thank you for your big obedient heart for giving up so much for me and blessing me with an amazing relationship with you today.
You bring me hope and peace and I'll spend my life gladly serving you.
Help my friends, my loved ones, the acquaintance I've yet to meet, recognize you today.
Reveal yourself uniquely to each one, so we're all left with the certainty we've met the One True Holy God.
Ruin us for an ordinary life.
In our weakness, we look to you, our Strength.
Amen.



Monday, October 22, 2012

The Antidote to Insecurity

One Thing Remains by Jesus Culture
Higher than the mountains that I face, Stronger than the power of the grave.
Constant through the trial and the change.... One thing remains, One thing remains

Your love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me (X3)

On and on and on and on it goes, It overwhelms and satisfies my soul
And I never ever have to be afraid... One thing remains

In death and in life I'm confident and covered by the power of your great love
My debt is paid there's nothing that can separate my heart from your great love


Change is certainly something we can trust.
The news that a loved one is struggling with a terminal illness....
Financially uncertain times...
Jobs come and then they go....
Friends & lovers decide its not worth the struggle and leave....
Changing times, changing seasons.
In fairness, not all change is bad.
Babies come, ah. Who doesn't love that?!
If only kittens and puppies would stay kittens and puppies.
The blush of new love.

When change comes in the form of news that shakes our sense of stability, our sense of security, what gives you peace?
In the car, factoring in new news, I found myself praying in the Spirit, thanking Him that He is my Prince of Peace.  The strong tower I run to.
Running to you, God, is my self comforting behavior. :-)
Thank you that Your love never fails, it never gives up and it never runs out on me.
On and on and on and on it goes, it overwhelms and satisfies my soul
And I never ever have to be afraid.

You have this.  You see, You understand, You have a good plan and the story isn't done.
Your great goodness and kindness isn't defined by these little limited circumstances.
Thank you that your peace passes understanding.

You truly do inhabit the praises of Your people.

Gotta get this album...



Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Dual Citizenship

So I sought for a man among them who would make a wall, and stand in the gap before Me on behalf of the land, that I should not destroy it; but I found noone.  Ezekiel 22:30

You also be patient.  Establish your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is at hand.  James 5:8

Presidential debates = disappointment

This morning I find myself reminded in my quiet time that I am a dual citizen.  Not in the formal sense but a very proud citizen of the United States of America and a citizen of the kingdom of God.
Both with privileges and responsibilities.

I watch the debates because I feel it's my duty not because I like it.
I will vote because that's a part of my responsibility, regardless of how enamored or not I am about the choices.
Not voting is abdicating.
And living beneath the grand price those who came before me paid so dearly for me to have.
I consider the passivity that does not participate an active dishonoring of the gift we have been given.

But I'm working through a sense of sadness.
This is not my home.
I long for the day Jesus comes back and all will see that He, by His grace, His power and His price, deserves the rule to which He was called.

Til then, Lord, I look to do my part and I look to the day when You do what only You can do.
In the meantime, fill me with your love for humanity, one person at a time.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Chronos and Kairos

I am no Greek scholar, but I appreciate the subtleties I find in the choice of words used in the Bible. 
In our everyday language, time is time. 
In the Greek, there is the passage of time, one second followed by another second....chronos.  
And there is the fullness of time, like when a baby is born, an opportune or strategic time...kairos. 
Our faithfulness in the chronos can lead to kairos.

This summer is momentous for us as a family in the accumulated effects of chronos leading to kairos moments.  
This summer my sweet honey and I will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary.  
Truly a gift from God.  
Such a long way from when I called off the wedding.  
Strategically, incidentally, one of the best decisions I made in the establishment of what having a healthy marriage would morph into over the course of time.
Who knew?  At the time it was just pain.
Our oldest just graduated from college and will be moving away to her new full time job in a different city.
Our middle has gotten a great job working in Alaska over the summer doing awesome man work.
Our youngest has 2 weeks left in 8th grade, then our 18 year journey of homeschooling will come to an end.
When we started out considering what to do with the postcard we received in the mail about kindergarten roundup, I never would have dreamed so many years would be spent investing in our kid's life education.  On so many fronts, I am inadequate.  
But by God's grace, I am obedient and determined.  
Chronos choices leading to kairos moments, every one.
Each of us making choices every day, small seemingly incidental choices that accumulate into the life we craft.  
Whether we're paying attention or not, whether we're intentional or not, we're crafting a life.
The only one here we'll get.
Then comes the time, whether we believe in God or not, that we will be faced with eternity's destination hinging on the life we chose to craft. 
There are no do-overs.
This is it.
And while I don't spend a lot of time agonizing over choices in the past I would do differently with today's wisdom, I do have regrets that teach me.
At some point along the way, I chose to step away from the big vision I had for my life and embrace whatever a beautiful life He would have for me would mean. Joys and sorrows. 
I hand You over the illusion of control and embrace You and Your design, whatever that looks like. 
Father, how do I love You and love them today? 
How do I faithfully steward the blessings you've given?
How do I not screw this up in my humanity? :-) 
He's so good. And gentle and kind. Such a great dad. 
And my hopeful prayer is to spend eternity with Him and as many as I can influence as possible. 
A more beautiful life I couldn't hardly imagine, the one I'm living.
What kind of life are you crafting?
Is it satisfying?  
Notice I'm not asking if it makes you happy.  
Happiness is fleeting depending upon circumstances.  Joy, true joy, is a gift that circumstance does not define. 
What choices can you make differently today that will send you closer to the life you would prefer?
Look at your chronos, moment by moment choices.  
Will the momentum they create lead you, like a boat pushed away from shore, closer to where you want to go? To the kairos you hope to see.
If not, change your choice.
You are the boss of your choice.  
You reap the consequence, for good or ill. 
Embrace your power of choice and use it wisely. 
All the time.






Tuesday, May 15, 2012

And to the knitting

I've ruminated.
On with the knitting.
I've had 3 cups of delightfully fully caffeinated coffee on an empty stomach, so watch out. 
Ye have been fairly warned, proceed at yer own risk.  
(International Speak Like a Pirate Day is every September, never hurts to stay prepared for that.) 

Tonight the knitting/crocheting group that I'm a part of is going to a great yarn shop in the cities and I'm excited to go and to be with the ladies.
I'm a relatively new knitter, completely taken by surprise with how much I LOVE this after being intimidated by it for years. I started 8 months ago and like most everything else I do, I tend to jump in with both feet to knock out the uncomfortable learning curve that's just a part of learning new things. 
Really don't like that so I try to learn as fast as I can to get it over with as quickly as possible, like jerking off a bandaid from a hairy arm. :-) 
Immersion is my thing.  Truly self comforting behavior. LOL.
Anyway. 
And with the knitting, there's a God story that began it and I'll just leave that for another post. 
I'm still knitting for loved one's birthdays, special events or holidays or needs we have around the house. (or the miscellaneous baby hat that's just toooo cute to pass up!) 
And I try to conquer new techniques with each project, so that helps with a sense of accomplishment. 
What I learn, I can teach someone else.  Love that!
Yes, I'm trying to figure out a Tea Cozy that I want to  make 'cause that's just a need...:-) Me thinks tackling Felting is in my future. 
One thing that has been a passive solution search is how to containerize the different knitting projects I have going. My friends have said I have Knitting ADD.  Whatever.  Squirrel!
There are some things I'm determined to be loyally committed too with singular focus, Jesus, my husband, my kids, the mission He has for me while on earth, my friends, that kinda thing.  Other stuff isn't vital in that regard, and I can indulge my need for change in ways that don't compromise my morals.  
Funny that sense of wanderlust. My parents moved with jobs all throughout my early life and every couple of years I get antsy for change. 
Hairstyles, clothes, cooking techniques, painting a room, and knitting.  
The distraction technique that we employed with our 2 year olds can be easily utilized for personal life management I find. 
Easy, less expensive fix compared to uprooting the fam. 

I found this really cute laundry basket at Target that's the holding spot for the little project bags I have going.
One thought was to take a coat hanging hall tree kinda thing and hang the see-through project bags on it.
But I'm still collecting ideas.  
One thing I have learned over the years is that an enthusiastic novice spends money on things she doesn't need. Trying not to do that. 
So if you have any suggestions, I'd love to hear them. 

And a thought I'd leave you with for the day:
We may not have control over all that happens in our day, this is true.
We do, however, control how we process and respond.
Be in charge of you.  Own your decisions and their consequences.
Self control is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. 
Join me in getting to know Him better. 
I know His empowering ability to walk through this life brings God glory and for the most part, keeps me out of self-generated trouble. :-) 



Monday, May 7, 2012

Time is not my own

I couldn't even write 'my' time is not my own.
ugh.
What would life look like if I lived obediently, moment by moment, to what I know He's asked me to do, whatever that might be?

There are some truths that are as solid as bones and out of our gaze just as they are.
We know they are there, we can see the structure they provide, but we don't see the bone itself. 
For the one who loves Jesus, He has earned the right of direction in our lives and we, in theory, gladly bow the knee in humble submission to His kind intentions for us.
But sometimes....
It's like the daughter of a friend of mine once said when she was told to sit down, went to sit while saying, 'I'm standing up on the inside.'
Sometimes, I just stand up on the inside.
Infuriating the one-sided debate:  'sit down, you know it's truth, just do the right and timely thing'.  no arguing tone, just quiet declaration. While the other side, petulantly says, 'I don't feel like it. Later, maybe.' 

So when I know I should be doing something as simple as washing the dishes while I cook dinner, I leave them for 'after dinner' and in truth, after dinner becomes tomorrow morning. 
'Cause you know, it's more fun to knit than wash dishes. 
My desires instead of just taking care of business.  Putting play before the work I know needs doing. 
Not legalistically but gracefully holistically. The whole life in You being honored. A time for everything under heaven. 

I identify with my brother, Pauly who said in Romans 7:21 'I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good. 22 For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man, 23 but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members.24 Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!'

And when Jim tells us in James 4: 17 Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.

Father, help me this day, to not just be sorry for mishandling the fleeting gift of time you allow me.  Help me to understand I am standing in opposition to Your great holiness when I exalt myself in any fashion.  Pride, stubbornness, horrifying things in light of Your great holy nature. To play well when it is playtime and to work well when it is work time, whatever that looks like in the messy beauty of ordinary days with You. 
amen.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Enemies and Friends

Not everyone who mistreats you is your enemy. 
Not everyone who treats you well is your friend.

In the parable of the persistent widow, Luke 18, the judge relents and grants the widow her requests because she's been so persistent saying in 18:5 'yet because this widow troubles me I will avenge her, lest by her continual coming she weary me.' Granted it's a parable Jesus uses to teach a lesson and not a relaying of a happening that occured, it's not too much of a stretch of the imagination to think this fictional widow could have thought the judge her enemy all along the course of time he wasn't granting her request.  
Then there is Jael.  Sweet, kind, hospitable Jael we read about in Judges 4.  When the commander of the opposing army in a conflict happening in that moment comes to her tent, weary, seeking respite, she invites him in.  When he asks for water, she gives him milk. Battle fatigued, he sleeps.  While he's being refreshed in slumber, she quietly takes a tent peg & hammer and bangs it through his temple, killing him. I would suppose he lay down his head counting his blessings he came across such a friendly camp. 

Not everyone who mistreats you is your enemy.
Not everyone who treats you well is your friend. 

Father, bless us with your wisdom, the nudges of the Holy Spirit to guide us through our days, navigating well the relationships we have.  Let us trust in You, not leaning into our own understanding when the nudges come and we don't know why we feel the way we do and maybe can't even put words around the sense of caution we have. Father, by your grace help us to be loving in this generation, showing your love in practical, everyday ways to all we bump into while it is still called today. 
In Jesus' beautiful name.
Amen

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The wisdom of Morpheus

"This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill -- the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill -- you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes."

"What you know you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad."


So says Morpheus from the movie, Matrix. 
Imagine..... how crazy an idea that one could live in a simulated world. 
And it seems to me, it's happening all around us. 
Sometimes we work so hard at living in ignorance of truth, what's really real.
And I'm including me in that.
We're busy.
Busy about many things. 
Lots of them important, many of them not.
We believe what we want to believe. 
Something is wrong with the world.
There is something comforting about order, tidiness, neatness, cleanliness, clear straight lines, boxes to check, lists to cross off, wiped counters, non-snotty noses, cars that have no McDonald's french fries on the floor. Plastic. Life with the blue pill.

I've chosen the red pill.
Funny thought that.  Jesus, you are my red pill.
Reality as You define it leaves the world to call me crazy.  
And I still know it's true.  
You are the way. 
The Truth.
The Life.
And life with You is messy. 
And wonderful. And scary.  And You take me places I'd never think to go and get me in circumstances I don't see a way out.  Introducing me to people You want me to love. 
But there You are, my light in dark places with the audacity to have a mischievous smile on your face beckoning for more adventures. How could one ever say no to that? :-) 
You truly make a genius life. 
There is still plenty that I would like different and I'm so grateful You're ok with my sharing my opinions with You. 
For however long I get to live, I am, without question, so astounded to have had the chance to do it with You. 
Help me always to live in truth. And love people big enough to share that with them. 





Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Hammock-ed in His love

Philippians 1:6
being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.

Amen.
Praying for a friend of mine this morning and this scripture came to mind. 
Thank you, Father, for your sweet, tender care. 
Lately this concept of being 'hammock-ed' in His love has been just perking through  my thoughts. 
When we're lying in a hammock, we're vulnerable.
We're unable to make ourselves secure, we have to trust in the soundness, the integrity of how the hammock was constructed.  We can't make us stay up. :-) 
Relaxing into the hammock and simply enjoy being weightless, and held. 
Well held.
That is what the Father's love is like.
It doesn't matter if we don't feel like we deserve it.  If the truth came out, if all our history was shown for all to see, we wouldn't be loved. 
Nope.  That's not how that works.  There is something within us that wants to earn, to deserve. 
And He tells us to simply receive.  
He knows everything, He's seen what's happened, He gets our past trash.  
And loves us anyway.
Today, Father, help me.  By the blessing of the Holy Spirit, help me to live like a well-loved child, held securely in your love and freely give that to everyone around me. Enable me to be the change I want to see happen around me, start with me. 
In Jesus' beautiful name,
amen. 

Monday, April 2, 2012

beginning


ru·mi·nate/ˈro͞oməˌnāt/

Verb:
  1. Think deeply about something: "we sat ruminating on the nature of existence".
  2. (of a ruminant) Chew the cud.

I enjoy thinking deeply and I enjoy knitting.  Sometimes together.  Chewing cud, not so much.  I'll leave that to others better suited to that venture.  There are certainly many more aspects to me than thinking and knitting, but it's a start. 
Gotta figure out this 'blog' thing.